Peaches' stats:•19mm•2 lb 15 oz
Whew! We finally made it to the third trimester. It has been a rough ride, and to be honest I'm pretty excited to be nearing the end of pregnancy and the beginning of mommyhood! We went to University Hospital on Tuesday for another ultrasound (number 5), a consultation with a pediatric neurologist, and a check-up. And for the first time since seeing positive on the pee stick we got good news!
Before talking about Tuesday though, I'd better go back a bit and explain why we were even there. At 20 weeks (March 22) Scott and I excited went for my second ultrasound. We though this was mainly to determine gender (although we were 99% sure she was a she), but they also look at how every part of the baby is forming. The tech measured her head as being slightly large at 11mm instead of 10mm. Since it was such a tiny difference, my doctor told us not to worry yet, but to have a follow-up ultrasound a week later.
When we went in for u/s 3 (March 28), the ventricles in Evie's brain were swollen to 14mm and they diagnosed ventriculomegaly (meaning she had too much fluid up there) which they explained was because her brain wasn't draining the excess spinal fluid properly. We freaked out and were very stressed and worried for the 3 weeks until going for a follow-up with a specialist at University Hospital at 23.5 weeks (April 17). That was a very busy and emotionally tough day for the three of us. We began with an ultrasound at 10am followed by a consultation. Then Evie and I had our first MRI, which was scary, but we were brave and only pushed the 'freak-out' button once :). Then we met Dr. Metz who is a specialist in maternal-fetal medicine and high-risk pregnancies. Scott and I liked her a lot, which is fortunate since we were informed that she is our new OBGYN. (Evie didn't comment, but she seemed content enough). Finally we met with the so-called financial 'counselors' who were completely useless and referred us to websites. We finished out the day by stopping by Ikea which raised our spirits quite a bit.
The outcome of that day was not promising. We were told that Evie's ventricles had swollen to 19mm and she had full-fledged hydrocephalus. I was told to prepare for a C-section because her head would be too large to deliver vaginally. We were told that she had agenesis of the corpus callosum, meaning she was missing a large and important part of her brain. The doctor said "This is a frustrating diagnosis because we really can't tell you what to expect until she's born". Our prognosis was anywhere from completely normal to severely disabled. We were told that the next few months would be careful monitoring and waiting. I HATE waiting. More accurately, I hate not knowing what to expect, and not being able to plan for it. We were scared and sad and worried. I felt guilty, thinking this was somehow my fault as her mom, as the one whose body was creating her, even though the doctors all said there was nothing Scott or I did or didn't do that could have made any difference. I felt angry that pregnancy is so miserable for me when I had been expecting so much joy. We were heartbroken that our baby girl was damaged, that something was already very wrong with her and she hadn't even entered the world yet. Mostly, I felt depressed and hopeless.
Through a lot of prayer and wonderful family support, we made it through those first weeks. It is still really hard, and really scary, but there have been some amazing blessings too. I have felt very powerful witnesses from my Heavenly Father that He knows and loves all three of us. I have felt the strength and bravery of my little girl and have been awed by how trusting and valiant she is in following whatever plan her Father has for her. Scott and I have had to depend on each other and have grown so much as a couple and a united team. He is amazing and I am so grateful that he is my partner for whatever life sends us.
The most recent miracle came this week (May 15, 27.5 weeks) when we went up for another full day at U Hospital. The night before I felt a very strong impression that I should "stand back and watch the miracle". I felt hopeful for the first time since 20 weeks. And it really was a day of miracles. We met with Dr. Lloyd, a neurologist at Primary Children's who we instantly adored. He told us that although Evie's ventricles are swollen, he thinks it is because there is extra space created by the small corpus callosum (CC *we found out after the MRI that her CC isn't missing entirely, but is very tiny and under-formed) rather than a plumbing issue. He said it is pretty normal and in all likelihood would not require a shunt! Up to this point, we had been told she would most likely need a shunt placed right after birth to help drain the excess fluid, so we were very excited that she may not need the surgery after all. He said that my fears of Evie being whisked away for surgery and monitoring right after birth were unwarranted, and that barring any unforeseen issues, we would be able to hold her and be together after delivery. He told us that he would be presenting Evie's MRIs at a conference of neurosurgeons that week and would let us know what everyone thought. Evie- you are your parent's baby- already trying to be in the spotlight!
The ultrasound was even more surprising. Evie's ventricles were measuring at 19mm- exactly the same as four weeks before. Her swelling had completely stopped! After growing 8mm in 3.5 weeks to not change at all in 4 weeks is truly a miracle to me. She is still measuring about 13 days ahead of her due date and her femur is measuring at 30 weeks! I don't know where she got height from, but so far she is very tall. Her weight was also ahead of schedule at 2lb 15oz instead of the predicted 2 lb at 28 weeks. She is a big baby so far and everything besides her brain looks completely normal- spine, face, limbs, organs. We are so grateful that the rest of her is developing normally because it points to a better outcome overall. Because of the positive results of the u/s, Dr. Metz gave me some great news. She said Evie has a very good chance of delivering vaginally at 37 weeks as long as her head stays small enough. I might not have a C-sec after all! We will monitor her very closely between weeks 34 and 37 and if she is small enough go for it. If her head gets too big we'll still wait until 39 weeks and deliver her via C-sec. But, I am very hopeful. July 20th seems like years ahead of August 10th, and it seems very close. Honestly though, I am more than ready to be done with this whole pregnancy ordeal and have Evie where I can see her and hold her. I know there will be many challenges with having a new infant (especially one with special needs) and that terrifies me, but pregnancy has been a trip. And not in a good way.
So, as a treat for those of you who've borne with me through all of this explanation, here are some really cool MRI photos. We were able to get a CD of all of the images (and there are hundreds) but these are my faves.
